Backstory: Last night I attended a taping of "On The Story" at George Washington University. The show is about how the journalists gather and report the news.
For those of you familiar with CNN's woes when it comes to being first with breaking news, you'll realize just how comical this whole premise is. But I digress.
"On The Story" consists of a panel of the CNN reporters who covered the big stories of the week. This week was particularly interesting with London, Roberts and Rove all making news. The show was hosted by Kyra Phillips and the panel consisted of Christian Amanpour, Suzanne Malveaux, Kelli Arena and Ed Henry.
As we entered the studio, producers asked us to submit questions for the panelists. Being a CS guy, you can imagine what my question was. I assumed that the selected questions would be posed to the panelists by Kyra Phillips.
When you assume ...
The questions, as it turns out, are posed by the audience member who wrote them. The floor producer was in charge of finding those selected and reseating them in view of the cameras. The first five people to ask questions were selected before the show began. I was not one of those. During the commercial breaks, the producer continued to call people's names. Eventually my name was called and I had to switch seats ( I was actually mad since I did have a great seat!).
So, there I was, F-13 -- The F block, asking question 13. During the commercial break before the F block, I was reseated to yet a third seat and Kyra Phillips was positioned to my left. She came over and introduced herself. I told her I was a big fan (that's an inside joke, sorry)! She was very polite and shook my hand (which she promptly wiped on her pants).
The plan was simple: come back from commercial, Kyra introduces a package and then, after the footage, I ask my question. During the package she asked me to stand and get ready. As it turns out, she's about 3 feet tall. I felt like Andre the Giant standing over Hulk Hogan in Wrestlemania III.
So, there I was standing, waiting, and trying to figure out where to put my hands while the clip was playing. The "arms crossed" stance just makes you look annoyed, so I quickly decided against that. The pockets are right out. The "clasp in front" looks too much like you're reciting the pledge of allegiance. I decided on the only remaining option: hands in my back pockets. Classy!
But, as I was told to "standby", I was again facing the same problem. Having my hands in my back pockets was okay while we were killing time off camera, but it's totally inappropriate for the integrity of cable news. With few options, and very little time, I decided to go with the standard "national anthem stance". Yes, this is the same as the "pledge of allegiance" stance, but I thought a new name would spice up the story.
When she finally put the microphone in front of my face, I considered grabbing it Jerry Springer style and yelling, "My question is for the sex crazed midget, er, little person in the chaps!"
For those of you related to me (I identified myself by full name), you'll be glad to know that I refrained.
The question went off without a hitch. The best part, though, was that Kyra asked a follow up while I remained standing. More free face time for the Hawk! With the question out of the way, I used the extra time for good: flashing the peace sign, and pointing to the Hospice Golf Outing logo on my tee-shirt. And, for those of you who can read lips, you're in for a special treat.
Kidding.
As usual, what could have happened is so much funnier than what really did.
My question comes near the end of the one hour show. So, if you're too impatient to wait to see me, I will post a screen capture of it here as soon as it is available.
Update: 52 minutes after the show starts, Will takes the reigns! For the record, here is what I say:
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes, I'm Will Hawkins (ph) from Charlottesville, Virginia. And I was wondering what you considered to be your best technological asset when you're tracking down a breaking news story. (ref)
As soon as I can get a screen capture from the show, I will post it here.
No comments:
Post a Comment